To date I have looked back at the end of each month in this series ‘Life after full time work’. For my May entry, however, I will be looking forward. What lies ahead this year, and how might that shape my approach to this stage of my life?
Well, the first thing that lies ahead is my volunteering as a reading helper for Coram Beanstalk. After a necessarily in depth application, vetting and training period I am ready to make my first visit to the school that will be hosting me for at least the next year. I feel as though I will be a good fit for the role, but I can’t be sure until I am in situ delivering my sessions. I have experience of teaching roles that have proved difficult so I am aware of the signs to look for. At the moment though I am looking ahead in the expectation that this will become an important aspect of my life for the next few years.
This month I will also learn what lies ahead in terms of paid work. I am pretty much guaranteed work with the RCA but I don’t know when it might start and how many weeks it will be for. It’s always a slightly unsettling period because I am well aware that the paid work I do is what will give us the leeway to go on holiday or pay for home improvements or cover unexpected expenses. We can work within our limitations of one income, otherwise I would not have taken the decision I have, but whatever I can contribute will make life that bit more comfortable.
One thing I am going to have to work on is my attitude to this new stage of my life. I can’t shake off a lingering sense of not contributing to the household. Janet is always at pains to point out that I contribute in areas such as healthy cooking and making her time away from work more relaxing, but the capitalist imperative of money making as the be all and end all is very difficult to shake off. I know that I am probably more concerned with this element of my new lifestyle than I should be, and I know that to get the full value from my efforts to recalibrate I need to shake this off, but it’s going to be difficult. I am working on my physical health and using the Calm App to develop my ability to relax, reflect and react with mindfulness, but I can’t help feeling that to some extent these efforts are self indulgent. We would like to go on retreat at some point to allow me to be alone with my thoughts and to allow some element of spirituality back into my life. I feel that doing this would help me to put this period of adjustment into its proper perspective.
Another thing that I am trying to put into practice is a daily or weekly routine, something that volunteering and work will definitely help with in the short term. At the moment I am trying to impose this kind of routine on myself and to be frank it’s not working. Looking ahead I may try to be guided by my instincts a bit more, because I may be working against myself at the moment. The problem with a routine is that it’s a leftover from my previous life and it is not really compatible with my new life. It’s connected to the 40 plus years of life where the work that I have done has been guided by the job I am doing for someone else. Perhaps if I regard myself as my own employer and listen to what that employer wants from me I will be able to make more progress. It would mean accepting that some days will be less productive than others and that I need to be very aware of hints that my mind and body are giving me.
So, that’s where I am at present. It’s quite difficult to look ahead with so many imponderables, but look ahead I must. When I get caught in the day to day I find myself becoming discontented, disorientated and frustrated. When I look ahead I do so with trepidation, confusion and uncertainty. However, I am now convinced that it is only through working my way through all the doubts that I will truly make the most of what lies ahead. Wish me luck!
Do you vote in political elections?
It’s an article of faith for me that voting is an absolutely essential part of being a citizen of any country. I would happily endorse the Australian approach where the election takes place on a weekend and you are fined if you don’t register a vote. That’s in direct conflict with the approach in the UK and the US where governments are trying to make it ever more difficult to vote in an attempt to fraudulently hold on to power. The type of voter fraud that gave the UK government the excuse of introducing the requirements for voter ID is vanishingly rare. The fact that nearly every type of ID for older voters was acceptable and only passports and driving licences were accepted for younger voters showed that this was a case of voters who as a group vote ‘in the right way’ being helped and voters who as a group vote ‘in the wrong way’ being hindered. The irony is, of course, that older voters are far more likely to vote in elections than younger voters anyway, which is why they are courted by political parties.
All of the above are merely functional issues that either force people to vote or dissuade them from doing so. However, there is no excuse for anyone not voting. If you don’t like the options in front of you, you owe it to previous generations who fought for your right to vote to come along in person or send in a postal vote that is spoiled in some way. In the future, hopefully the near future, there will be a way of harnessing technology to ensure that voters are able to exercise their democratic rights. It is easy to confirm identity with facial recognition and the opportunity for fraud would be far less than the critics would have you believe. In the UK the obvious approach would be to move elections to the weekend rather than continuing to tie it to the 18th century Market Days which is why we vote on a Thursday!! We all know that won’t happen because it won’t be acceptable to some interest group or another.
Anyway, the message here is to just vote even if you feel it’s a waste of time. Exercise your democratic rights. If you don’t you have no right to complain about anything the government does even if it leads to you being treated unfairly.
What gives you direction in life?
We were a couple of weeks away from our second overseas stint in Hong Kong in 2002. To say goodbye to friends we organised a meeting at a local pub with a beer garden and play area. One of those who attended was the Mother of a very good friend of mine at the time. It was very nice to see her, but her son was extremely embarrassed when her first comment on seeing Janet was, ‘I wanted to meet the woman who sorted David out!’ 🤣🤣 She was absolutely right as well. It’s Janet who has given me direction and focus for the best part of 40 years. It’s because of her that I am where I am. I dread to think what a waste my last four decades would have been without her.
Do you have a quote you live your life by or think of often?
I first came across this quote in 1998. At that time it was attributed to Mark Twain but that turned out to be an Internet misattribution. It was actually penned by H Jackson Brown in 1990. In those days people didn’t check things carefully on the Internet unlike now of course 🙄🤔😏 Anyway, I was so taken by the quote when I saw it on a poster that I bought the poster straight away. It reflects the course of my life and the influence of my wife in how I live it. With my job taking us overseas I showed her sights she could never have imagined seeing, but she showed me how to live with courage and risk. If that quote stays in my head it is to remind me of the important things in life that she knows far more instinctively than I do.
What is your favorite holiday? Why is it your favorite?
Last year I went to Salzburg in November. It was the first purely Christmas themed break I had taken since 2007 when we took our daughters to Lapland to see Father Christmas. What both breaks had in common was a sense of magic and wonder that only really happens during the Advent and Christmas seasons, at least for me. A summer holiday is fine although I don’t really enjoy too much heat, but having been a teacher for so long I like the opportunity to explore places at other times of the year. I know that my wife just loves the sun and the heat and I am happy to go along with that, but I never feel like I am in another frame of mind at any other time like I am at Christmas so I really enjoy myself and let the stresses and strains completely drift away. So, I will definitely be having a Festive break again very soon.
David Pearce - Popular Culture and Personal Passions 