What principles define how you live?
I joined the Cub Scouts in a place called Hoo in Kent back in 1974. I instantly took to the whole concept, the uniforms, the camping, the sixes and the promise. That promise has been part of me for over 50 years and, oddly enough, I hadn’t thought of it in nearly 40 years. Why has it become buried in my memory bank?
I went from Cubs to a Scout troop that I really didn’t like, full of bullying and unpleasantness, and I ended up leaving the organisation for a couple of years. Around the time I was 13 my Dad started up a new Scout Troop based on the principles and set up that was common when he had been a Scout 30 years earlier. It became the centre of my life for a few years as I looked to escape from my awful experience at school.
We were a disciplined Troop who were guided by the principles of the Scout Law and Promise as they had existed when my Dad was a boy, something that the organisation in Medway really disliked. They fought running battles with my Dad but he was much too wily for them. Every year, the troops and packs were inspected by the local ‘bigwigs’ who detested the way the troop was run and who in turn were the villains of the piece to us. One year they said that they were going to inspect the troop on a particular date. My Dad told us that we were going to get an inspection the week before to try to catch us out. He was right, we were prepared and we all took great pleasure in telling the inspectors that we knew what their game was! The people who were inspecting the troop were pen pushers who had no idea what traditional scouting was all about. My Dad and his fellow leaders were light years ahead of them in understanding young people and they knew it.
So, what are the Scouting principles I still live by?
The Cub Scout Promise of the 1970s was
I promise that I will do my best to do my duty to God and to the Queen, to help other people and to keep the Cub Scout Law.
In those days, there was one promise for Scouts of all faiths or of none and when you said it you were essentially reciting it as a catechism. The Cub Scout Law, in contrast, was very specific and it is this that I internalised more deeply than I realised over the 50 years since first learning it.
Cub Scouts always do their best, think of others before themselves and do a good turn every day.
As a set of principles for living they don’t come much better and they could not be summarised more succinctly.
Just a final thought. My Dad, who I talked about in this post, died over 30 years ago. I am now exactly the same age as he was, to the day, when he died. He’s still very much present to me and I think he would give me a subtle nod of approval if he could see my progress and the way I have kept the Cub Scout Law and the Scouting principles so close to my heart.
What have you been putting off doing? Why?
Well, for a start I put off the writing of this post! I had a good reason though. Janet and I went to the Copperjax Stadium to watch the London City Lionesses vs West Ham United in the WSL. It’s only been the past few years that I have started to go to Women’s Football and I have enjoyed it far more than I ever could watching Men’s Football. It’s a game that is played in great spirits and at an increasingly high level of skill. The atmosphere in the crowd is brilliant and totally positive throughout. There is passion for the team you are supporting but none of the aggressive and unpleasant tribalism that makes the men’s game a no go area for me. I am now disinterested in the men’s game at all levels and far more engaged with the women’s game at all levels of the pyramid. Women’s football is the game as it should be on and off the pitch. Give it a go if you haven’t already. Who knows, you might like it.
When was the first time you really felt like a grown up (if ever)?
I suppose like anyone I have never felt like I have ever got things completely sussed. If you saw me at work, you could get the mistaken impression that I was fairly sorted in my teaching. The truth, of course, was that I kept making mistakes every time I stepped into the classroom and I never felt like there was a time when I had everything under control. This is true for life in general I think.
At 18, I got my first job. Did I feel like an adult? No way! I was too busy realising that I was unsuitable for the job I had taken. As I mentioned the other day, I joined the RAF at 19. Did I feel like an adult then? Not a chance. I got married at 25. What about then? Still no, as I was still a student! I could go on, but the pattern is clear. At various points I picked up more and more adult skills but never fully felt like one.
Surely things have changed now that I have finished year round teaching? Well, no actually. I am having to completely relearn things about myself and indeed who I am. Janet said something a couple of days ago which really took me aback. She said that I was finally myself again after years of being too preoccupied by work. I couldn’t believe that I had lost sight of myself to that extent, but if I am honest it’s probably because I always felt like I was coming up short in all areas of my life. I have been reading the first two books of Philip Pullman’s Book of Dust trilogy, the final part of which is published this month! In the second book, The Secret Commonwealth Lyra and Pan, her Daemon are estranged because she’s forgotten who she is. That really hit home, because if I had a Daemon I think it would find my approach to life at odds with my real self.
Over the last six weeks I have been trying to reconnect with who I am, and obviously doing so with some success as it has been noticed. However, I still have a long way to go and I will make a number of mistakes along the way, as you do when you are growing up. It’s a work in progress, this journey through life and at heart I will always be the child below who is hoping for the best, learning from mistakes and never quite feeling like he has things sorted.
If you had a million dollars to give away, who would you give it to?
I always thought that if I ever won the lottery I would give away as much as possible once we were financially secure. First in line would be our children who could definitely use the help at their stage of life. We wouldn’t dictate that they used it ‘for the best’ because we can’t say what the best is for them. It might be a holiday, it might be a house deposit, it might be further learning, but whatever it is I would love to give them more freedom to chase whatever goals they have.
Once they are sorted then the rest would go to the charities that are closest to our hearts. Shelter, Young Minds, Prostate Cancer, Dementia Research, Sands, Refuge and Cats Protection. They are important to us for a variety of reasons, both personal and in terms of our values. They would use our donations to further the amazing work that they do. I have linked to the UK sites but why not check out similar charities in your country or the causes closest to your hearts. We may not have a million to give away but we have something, whether it be financial, voluntary work or just making people aware of their existence. Here’s to the amazing people who give their time and talents to those worse off.
What’s something you would attempt if you were guaranteed not to fail.
I can’t imagine anything worse than a guarantee that you won’t fail at something. Yes, it’s a superficially appealing idea, but what would be the point of that type of success? Where is the journey through ups and downs, successes and failures? What are you actually achieving if it is pre-ordained that you will succeed?
I remember years ago a teenager who found that everything sporting came naturally to him. By 14 he was playing for his county at cricket and he was playing golf off a two handicap. He could have chosen to focus on either sport and been very likely to succeed. By the age of 16 he had given up both because he found it boring. He didn’t find a challenge in either so it wasn’t of any consequence to him how good he was. The interesting thing was that four of us played a round of golf together once and at the start he was playing badly but you could see how his swing had that flow that the rest of us lacked. I was so bad that I wouldn’t even say I hacked my way round, I made a mockery of the game! Around the turn something clicked and he started playing like the two handicapper he used to be. It was a challenge on that day to get back to where he used to be and he was under par for the back nine. Even as I was melting down I was watching him and thinking that he was poetry in motion on the golf course. If things had been more difficult for him in the early days he could well have turned professional.
So, if I was guaranteed success I wouldn’t do anything because there would be no point. You can only appreciate success if you have failed and picked yourself up. I know that there will be readers of this post who disagree. If you do, give your views in the comments as I would love to look at things from a different perspective.
David Pearce - Popular Culture and Personal Passions 