Removing the Barrier
What could you try for the first time?
Since I first decided I was finishing full time work all year round, I wanted to look for new ideas, new passions, new ways of approaching life. However, one thing has always been in my way, the fear of failure.
We are told very early on that ‘if at first you don’t succeed try try again’ and this, for me at any rate, was illustrated by the folk tale of Robert the Bruce and the spider. The story goes that he saw a spider in a cave where he was hiding and watched it spinning a web. The web kept breaking but the spider kept at it and was rewarded at the end. Robert then went out of the cave and defeated the English at Bannockburn!
Unfortunately, what was good enough for 14th Century Scots is no longer good enough for modern life. Now, if you fail, you are pilloried and criticised for a lack of effort. Human nature does not appreciate or tolerate failure in any situation. This starts from the earliest time it can, when babies are expected to hit a particular point of development at, for example 6 weeks old. If they don’t, it’s either a problem with them or the parents. Once they are in education they need to succeed first time or they and the teachers are criticised. There is no patience with or compassion for those who don’t succeed first, or occasionally, second time round.
This approach of ‘we don’t like losers’ is all pervading in politics, work, play and education. Turns out that it’s even there after you step away from the system. I would love to try art, and I was determined to start giving it a go. Sadly, there is this voice in my head saying, ‘It’s never going to be good enough’. The same goes for a number of things I want to try. Turns out, the first step to a new lifestyle or new experiences is trying to tune out that voice. It’s going to be a slow process but recognising where human nature sabotages you before you start is the first step to removing that barrier.
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David Pearce - Popular Culture and Personal Passions 
It’s a double-edged sword: people should be applauded for taking part, but when i hear of kids in schools being AWARDED for it even if they lost, it sends out the wrong message. There are winners and losers in life, and if you want to win you have to try harder, and even then it’s no guarantee of success. Trying is the important thing.
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You are right, but it is the speed at which we choose winners and losers that is the problem. At 13, my parents were told by my head of year that I would be a ‘Maths School failure’. These days, the ‘able’ students or potential sports players are chosen as soon as they arrive at the school or the club and if you haven’t been chosen at that point there is little or no chance of being chosen later.
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Also, I too have ‘heard’ of these participation awards being given out in schools but in 35 years or so of being in education, I never saw any being handed out. I’m not saying they don’t happen but they are almost certainly the exception that are spun as being the rule. It’s unfortunate, but so much of the media and society in general seems determined to denigrate schools and teachers at every opportunity. It’s what has led to the breakdown of regard and respect that they endure nowadays.
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There is too much pressure on school kids to be the best or to be high achievers from a very young age these days. We weren’t really given that push until secondary school
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There’s also the new culture of spinning tge most minor of achievements into a narrative of how incredible you are. There was a time where you were supposed to give things a go and – if you were actually really good – to be modest about it. Now you have to collect a list of achievements regardless of how mediocre the reality. I don’t have a LinkedIn profile as it is the embodiment of this.
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