Definitely the Thought That Counts

I can think of many gifts I have received in my life that stick out as being very special. They all shared one thing in common, the fact that the person buying the gift was thinking of me as a person. I know that sounds obvious, but how often have you received a generic gift from someone who you thought knew you very well? These gifts are bought with affection but without much thought, and we have all been guilty of buying those gifts. It could be that you don’t actually have much contact with the person, that it’s a ‘duty’ gift for someone you don’t particularly like or that things have been so hectic at work or at home that you’ve only had the chance to rush to the shops or buy a next day delivery gift online.

We can still appreciate the fact that the person has made an effort and that they are showing a connection to us, but in the end that gift may end up at the back of the cupboard, in a charity shop or regifted to someone else. I don’t actually dislike the idea of regifting because it shows a level of thought for the other person, as you are sure they would appreciate the gift more than you. In any case, the person who bought it doesn’t need to know what happened to it and honour is satisfied all round. I used to run Secret Santa gift exchanges in many of my jobs, partly due to my often mentioned love of Christmas, and partly because jobs are draining, demanding and often thankless these days and we all need something to look forward to. The Secret Santa worked for two reasons. First, because the forms I sent to people asked them for suggestions as to what the other person could buy them and second because we really liked each other and often went the extra mile. One of the great delights during present opening was seeing the faces of colleagues receiving completely unexpected and absolutely perfect gifts. Actually, there was a third reason. It was restricted to colleagues who weren’t in the upper management positions, because nothing kills the vibe more than your boss sitting in on the present opening!

Some of my favourite gifts have been the unexpected ones and, interestingly, gifts that initially I was not sure about. My wife is particularly adept at finding gifts I don’t know that I want and she is always spot on even if my initial reaction is one of bemusement. She has tried to encourage my creative side with various gifts and, after some initial internal reluctance, I have realised that she knows me better than I know myself! It is always amazing to reflect on gifts that have opened up new areas of interest, such as scrapbooking and organising photos, and how I could have thought for years and not come up with anything nearly as good for myself.

So, when you are buying a present, think of the person, think of their interests, think about an off the cuff comment they have made, replay conversations in your head. If you do all this and you give yourself enough time to get the present, I guarantee that you will make a difference to that person, either short term or long term. Happy present hunting!